OMG.

This song is now forever tainted in my mind. >_o

But that's not going to stop me from listening to it.

*scrubs brane*

What time is it? My cellphone says 2AM. The computer says 6AM. I am confused. >_o?

I'm awake for reasons unknown. But mostly hormones. Partially, mostly, kindof. I couldn't tell you what the rest of the reason is as I'm not sure of it myself.

TJ and Matt keep telling me to get things off my chest about certain people I like. I say 'eh'. Remember: Ally's are just as prone to fear of rejection as the rest of the world. They simply just don't show it as much. Plus, I don't want to be a fuckup and make things akward so we never talk anymore. Cause I love talking with Certain Person.

Anyhow, I have bacon and tea and music, so I should be alright. Gonna work on Pixely and occupy myself until I eithr crash again or become delerious. @_@

Spam via LJ? Fuckin' christ.... ( This was the comment I deleted: )

....ew.

Something near the computer smells /dead/. Ew. And I don't know what it is. It's only near the computer, and there's nothing dead-like around it. >_o

I'm bored and my brain wants to ramble. But I don't want to. But, I'll probably wind up succumbing to it sooner or later. Just to get things out.

I keep expecting TJ to come back home any minute. I think it's because I'm not used to her not being here. The night she left, I kept thinking she had just went somewhere and was going to be back any time. Probably the reason I was up until 5AM. o_o I mean, we've been bickering and bitching at each other for the last two weeks, but even after all that, I still miss 'er. Even though I know we need this time apart desperately. And she needed a vacation to ease her mind and all that.

I was hoping for a call from my mom this morning. See if she was going to go to Labor Ready. She didn't stop over yesterday, so I may need to hunt her down today. Even though there's only a quarter tank of gas in the car. :P Could always siphon some, but eh, I'm not up for illegal activities and vomiting today.

Think I'm gonna go and hang out with shin_neko tomorrow. I've got nothing else to do and after hearing about my other friend passing away, I'm becoming alot more reluctant to lose touch with people. Even those who my other friends aren't as fond of. But eh. Besides, he has kittens. Rabid, hyperactive KITTENS. o_o I need to go visit Doug and Joy, sometime, too. :D

I'd really like something to drink OTHER than water and tea. Because, for some reason, no matter how much sugar I put in my tea now, I can't tell there's even any in there. >_< And I'm getting low on food, so I have to worry about that, as well as the freaking cell phone. >_< Well, there is still bread and eggs, so I can always eat french toast until I puke...

I've been milling over just -why- I've developed a liking for Certian Person. I mean, he (yes, Certian Person is male. And that's probably all the information you're getting about him) is funny, entertaining, witty, sarcastic and all that. We have relativly similar interests. But it's weird because I can't place it as a physical/looks-related attraction because, honestly, my memory's hazy on what he looks like. So my attraction is based, more or less, on just personality. Which I suppose is good and all, but it's weird, because I'm used to thinking guys are good-looking first then finding out more about them. But now it's all bass ackwards.

And then there's the other end of the spectrum: I think someone I know may have a thing for me. Or, at least, that's what TJ tells me. I'm not good at picking up things when they're directed towards myself, but I can pick up on other people. It's weird like that. My empathy is all screwy. But the problem lies in the fact that I don't really think I'm all that attracted to Other Person. I mean, maybe I just need to get to know them better, talk more and all that. Because I'm not against giving someone a chance, it's just that I'm bound to get frustrated my conflicting emotions and say fuck it and forget there was ever any interest to anyone anywhere. I've done it before. And it sucks, but I'd rather hurt myself than hurt someone else I care about. :P

So yeah, I guess my brain did win today. Bastard. I'm going to get it removed.

Hm...I don't think the runt of Ramon's litter is going to make it. It was curled up in an opposite corner of where the rest of the gerbils were and it wasn't moving too much. I put it back in the pile, hopefully it'll try to eat some millet or Ramen will feed it. I don't think it'll hold out much longer, though I'm hoping for the best, so I'll keep an eye on it....

...I keep feeling things crawling on me or touching me. I mean, aside from my stray hairs I find lying about (everywhere). Mostly when I go to bed/sleep. I've been so paranoid cause I think there's spiders or crawlies on me. Perhaps this is why I don't sleep alone if I can help it. Anyone want to share my bed until TJ comes home. :3

Hm. That was unexpected. Carry on.

In web news, I updated Pixely. ^_^

TeeHEE!

I'm watching Reloaded. I makes me giggle with glee. <3<3<3<3 Just, everything about the movie, not just the hot sexxz0r.

I think the thing I love most about this movie over the other two Matrix movies is the interaction between the characters. Although, I'm sure another viewing or two of Revolutions would get me to like it better, but for character interacting, this one is my favorite.

I realized that everyone on my friends list is going to learn far more about me in the next two weeks than they ever wanted/needed/were curious to know. So fair warning in case I start babbling about really wacky shit. :D But I don't mind, cause I'm generall a very open person. I really have no shame, honestly. :D

Ah, fuckpuppies.

The little gerbil runt I meantioned earlier passed away. That much I expected. But when I went to check on the rest of them they were all acting spastic. Maybe because the one died, I don't know. But I discovered that one of the little black ones has somehow managed to break its back left leg. I don't know if it's been broken for awhile, cause it can steady itself on it and move around well enough. And two of the babies were squeaking madly at each other, I don't know if it's just cause they were in the log together and in each others' way or what. But I got them out of the log and Ramen went after the little orange one. Tried to attack the poor thing, from what I could tell. I had to toss Ramen away from the baby, wound up tossing her into the side of the tank before she stopped. I got all the babies out of the tank and they're in a little cage near me on the bed. I'm not sure if I should put them back in the tank with the others or what. Ramen doesn't quite seem well enough to take care of them anymore. They're eating millet and stuff now, so I could keep them in the cage, but I'm still worried about them getting the nutrients they need from their mother. I've got vitimans to put in the water, as long as they'd drink it. And I can't pawn them off on one of the other mothers, because they're too old. I'm most worried about the one with the broken leg, though. I wish I knew if it was recent or if it's already healed or what.

But they do seem alot more calm in the cage by themselves. They're eating and stuff. I just don't want to put them back in the tank and have Ramen kill them or something. I'll have to see if they'll drink water on their own. If so, I'll keep them seperated and I think we've got some kind of small/baby animal milk substitue around here somewhere. I can give that to them, too.

There's a little black runt, too. I'll have to keep an eye on that one, as well. Although, it's not as small as the other one.

Augh. -_-

EDIT: Well, I decided to put Ramen in with the babies. She's doing okay. I'm wondering if maybe having the other 4 in there with her was wigging her out. :P And the baby with the broken leg, I finally got ahold of. It seems ir's not even able to hold said leg against itself, like it can with the other one when I'm holding it upwards. It seems to be something in the upper leg/hip area that's broken or something. :P

Storytime, kiddies!

So, I was bored and felt the urge to write. So I did.

Now, let it be known that I am a super shitty writer. I do it, like most things, to get stuff out of my head. Wether it be about me or about my characters, which this little story is. More specifically, it's about Phoenix and Kyle. I've been wanting to write something along these lines for awhile now. So I did. Whee! And please don't proofread or correct anything. I know alot of it's probably wrong, but I don't care. That's how it came out of my head. And hell, as long as everything's spelled right and there's puncutation it's legible. So suck it up, monkeys. And, yes, I wrote it without names one purpose. There's a bit of repetitiveness, I'm aware of that. I think it's intentional. Or it is now, cause it makes me look like less of a tard. :D

And no, this story is in no way related to myself. I don't think. Even though Phe's like an alter ego, not everything she says/does/thinks is the same as what I say/do/think. ^_-

If you'd like to read more about Phe, add phe to your friends list. It's friends only, so I'll be sure to add you back ASAP. It's not updated often, so you won't be being spammed or anything.

I'm most fond of the last three paragraphs.

( Here it is... )

Augh.

I'm bored and starting to get cranky/moody. I think I need a nap. Or food. But I don't want the shrimp ramen I made. Ugh.

I wanna talk to TJ. But she's off doing something or another and I'm being selfish and greedy cause I mean, I live with her. Matt doesn't. But still. I miss 'er. Or maybe it's just cause I'm bored.

I feel like bitching about things. But then I don't. I really don't want to muster up the energy to bitch and moan.

I just feel crappy. Maybe it's cause there's no one online to talk to and I'm not getting attention. So my brain tells me it's cause no one wants to be bothered with me. :P Bleh.

I think I will take a nape. Maybe I'll have an interesting dream or something...

Eh. -_-