Stuff and ...
Apr. 25th, 2007 08:07 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
obliviousally_ljToday was horrible.
I kept dropping things and running into people and just generally not even being grounded enough to do my insanely easy job correctly.
And then I almost cried. In the middle of the cat food aisle while stocking cans of, like, turkey and giblets Friskies.
It was awful. I've never felt more, I don't know, empty and worthless.
Everything makes me want to cry. My music, the music at work, half the thoughts that manage to flit though my head while I'm trying to distract myself with something that doesn't upset me.
I feel like I have to ask permission to breathe. That I have to ask to actually, physically, curl up with her at night. I go out of my way to make sure my hands are to myself so I'm not overstepping these boundaries that've been placed between us.
You have no idea how hard this is.
I kept dropping things and running into people and just generally not even being grounded enough to do my insanely easy job correctly.
And then I almost cried. In the middle of the cat food aisle while stocking cans of, like, turkey and giblets Friskies.
It was awful. I've never felt more, I don't know, empty and worthless.
Everything makes me want to cry. My music, the music at work, half the thoughts that manage to flit though my head while I'm trying to distract myself with something that doesn't upset me.
I feel like I have to ask permission to breathe. That I have to ask to actually, physically, curl up with her at night. I go out of my way to make sure my hands are to myself so I'm not overstepping these boundaries that've been placed between us.
You have no idea how hard this is.
