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obliviousally_ljI'm stepping back and looking at this apartment thing. I'm coming to the realization that it seemed like a great idea at first. Really, I was all for it, as everyone knows. But now I'm seeing that we're moving into a place that has one room, a kitchen and a bathroom. It is barely half the size of the place we stay in now. We would have to find some way to squeeze our necessities as well as the animals into it. We would also be paying $250 for a place half the size of the place we pay $0 for right now. We would have to get a phone, a microwave, and various other things that we already have right here.
Now, where we're at right now may not be the best of places. But it's alot better now than it was 6 months ago. The Hag stays out of our business, she doesn't ask for the car unless she can put gas money in it, and she's learned to stay out of our shit. We have all but one room of this apartment to ourselves. We have all of our stuff here and we can keep our animals (although, we planned on letting go of a few of the gerbils anyhow).
The thing that's freaking me out and pressuring me so much is that everyone wants us to move into this apartment. Everyone think's it's such a fantastic idea. Everyone doesn't realize how small this place is and how little money we have. this transition does not look like a good one by looking at the big picture. We'd be getting a place of our own, but we're also losing everything else. This doesn't weigh out on our side. And I don't like that.
And, in a place that small, me and TJ would kill each other as we'd have nowhere to get away from each other.
If we stay here, we can use that extra $250 a month to use for gas to check out colleges and stuff. To get our asses to school so we can make money and move into a place more suitable for us. I really want to go to school, and moving into this apartment will severely hinder that. The apartment has already screwed over our zoo voulnteering and various other things we had planned. And I'm almost positive it will FUBAR future plans we have.
The only problem is, I want to know what TJ wants to do. I can deal no matter where we're at. But I know TJ needs some way to level out her sanity. She's been doing really well lately, as the Hag hasn't bothered us. And that's a good thing. But I don't know if this lack-of-money-moving-into-a-new-apartment is going to stress her out all crazy-like. Or, if the move will even matter to her brain.
I'm really torn on what to do. I'm leaning towards giving the keys back and walking away, but everyone's expecting us to move into this place and I don't like that. I'm feeling like I've got to move in order to be viewed as an adult or something. It's very aggravating. I don't want to be forced into something I'm unsure of, but I do want TJ to be happy. And I will move into this place if that's what she wants.
But I don't think we can pull it off.
Now, where we're at right now may not be the best of places. But it's alot better now than it was 6 months ago. The Hag stays out of our business, she doesn't ask for the car unless she can put gas money in it, and she's learned to stay out of our shit. We have all but one room of this apartment to ourselves. We have all of our stuff here and we can keep our animals (although, we planned on letting go of a few of the gerbils anyhow).
The thing that's freaking me out and pressuring me so much is that everyone wants us to move into this apartment. Everyone think's it's such a fantastic idea. Everyone doesn't realize how small this place is and how little money we have. this transition does not look like a good one by looking at the big picture. We'd be getting a place of our own, but we're also losing everything else. This doesn't weigh out on our side. And I don't like that.
And, in a place that small, me and TJ would kill each other as we'd have nowhere to get away from each other.
If we stay here, we can use that extra $250 a month to use for gas to check out colleges and stuff. To get our asses to school so we can make money and move into a place more suitable for us. I really want to go to school, and moving into this apartment will severely hinder that. The apartment has already screwed over our zoo voulnteering and various other things we had planned. And I'm almost positive it will FUBAR future plans we have.
The only problem is, I want to know what TJ wants to do. I can deal no matter where we're at. But I know TJ needs some way to level out her sanity. She's been doing really well lately, as the Hag hasn't bothered us. And that's a good thing. But I don't know if this lack-of-money-moving-into-a-new-apartment is going to stress her out all crazy-like. Or, if the move will even matter to her brain.
I'm really torn on what to do. I'm leaning towards giving the keys back and walking away, but everyone's expecting us to move into this place and I don't like that. I'm feeling like I've got to move in order to be viewed as an adult or something. It's very aggravating. I don't want to be forced into something I'm unsure of, but I do want TJ to be happy. And I will move into this place if that's what she wants.
But I don't think we can pull it off.
