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obliviousally_ljSome random writing. Just to push things out of my head. It's crappy, but I don't care.
I've discovered I really, really like I Want Love (studio mix) from the Silent Hill 3 soundtrack. Kind of how I'm feeling right now Or maybe not, I don't know. I think I need to sleep and it's hot in the bedroom.
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When she smiled, it was bittersweet. Forced onto her face and pulled at the edges. It wasn't a real smile, just one to get her through the day. To let everyone know she was okay and not to worry about her. Never worry about her, she's Miss. Opimistic. Always the one to lean on for support, to share everything with because she'd always laugh with you or cry with you.
Every day was filled with things she couldn't take. Little things here and there that made her want to scream and cry into her pillow. But no one was the wiser. No one thought that there was anything other than happiness around her. Were these other emotions any less desirable? She thought so. They made her feel weak and vunerable. She felt the great need to rely on someone when she felt like this. The need to turn to someone for support and for comfort. She was stronger than that, she wasn't a pathetic little girl.
There was a time when she never cried. When she never let amotion through. She almsot regretted letting that wall fall down. It needed to happen, and it fell because of a trusted person. But it left everything wide open for everyone to trample on. And the wall refused to be rebuilt. Too often was she left crying in the bathroom for anything good to come of her reconstruction. Too often were her insides twisted around because of words and looks.
Much too often did her emotions fluctuate recently. Barely able to keep them in check, she would say what she meant to keep in her head instead of what she should say. It hurt her that she caused such conflict, such...distress in others. It hurt her that she did these things to the ones she loved.
That smile again, forced at the edges. Just barely obvious that she was faking it.
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Nrrg. I should really keep some things in my head. They sound so lame written out...
I've discovered I really, really like I Want Love (studio mix) from the Silent Hill 3 soundtrack. Kind of how I'm feeling right now Or maybe not, I don't know. I think I need to sleep and it's hot in the bedroom.
------------------------------------------------------------------------
When she smiled, it was bittersweet. Forced onto her face and pulled at the edges. It wasn't a real smile, just one to get her through the day. To let everyone know she was okay and not to worry about her. Never worry about her, she's Miss. Opimistic. Always the one to lean on for support, to share everything with because she'd always laugh with you or cry with you.
Every day was filled with things she couldn't take. Little things here and there that made her want to scream and cry into her pillow. But no one was the wiser. No one thought that there was anything other than happiness around her. Were these other emotions any less desirable? She thought so. They made her feel weak and vunerable. She felt the great need to rely on someone when she felt like this. The need to turn to someone for support and for comfort. She was stronger than that, she wasn't a pathetic little girl.
There was a time when she never cried. When she never let amotion through. She almsot regretted letting that wall fall down. It needed to happen, and it fell because of a trusted person. But it left everything wide open for everyone to trample on. And the wall refused to be rebuilt. Too often was she left crying in the bathroom for anything good to come of her reconstruction. Too often were her insides twisted around because of words and looks.
Much too often did her emotions fluctuate recently. Barely able to keep them in check, she would say what she meant to keep in her head instead of what she should say. It hurt her that she caused such conflict, such...distress in others. It hurt her that she did these things to the ones she loved.
That smile again, forced at the edges. Just barely obvious that she was faking it.
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Nrrg. I should really keep some things in my head. They sound so lame written out...
