In which I bitch. Again.

[obliviousally_lj]

My theme for the last week-ish is TIRED.

I'm tired of hunting for a job. I'm tired of my friends having life throw shit at them. I'm tired of not having the rest of my rent. I'm tired of feeling like a failure. Ectera, ectera.

This is going to be an awfully bitchy/complain-y/wangsty post, but I'm not cutting it because it's my journal and Im pretty sure most everyone has abandoned LJ anyhow.

First off, I'm down to three pages in my Art History notebook and I don't want to start taking notes on the computer because I never retain it if I do. I need the physical act of writing words down if I'm going to remember ANYTHING in my classes.

Secondly, I don't get my money from working on campus until FRIDAY. And it's probably only going to be, like, $90 after taxes. IF I'm lucky. The money a friend sent me recently, some of it has gone towards things like gas for the car so Tony can get to work and food for the animals. I don't know how I'm going to get the rest of the money. I'm advertising commissions pretty much everywhere I can think of (if anyone knows any place to do so, please let me know!).

Thirdly, I feel like such a failure because I can't seem to get a job. I've been putting in applications for how long now? Months? And there's been next to nothing, which is both depressing and like a slap in the face because I'm a GOOD WORKER, for fuck's sake. I don't understand what's keeping people from calling me back. But it's frustrating and if I don't get a job soon, I don't know what I'm going to do. Probably uppercut someone into the sun.

Fourthly, I'm so tired of my friends having such a rough time. I feel bad because there's really not a lot I can do to help them.

Fifthly, I feel fat. I bought a bunch of stupid food when I got my food money and I just ate like a pig and now my clothes fit weird and I'm all FRUMP about it. Which is bizarre because when I'm not wearing anything, I feel fine. I don't feel fat at all. But because I've gained some weight, it's so, SO apparent to me when I'm dressed because things just don't fit as comfortably. This is also a work-related complaint because if I were working, I'd be getting exercise and it wouldn't matter what I ate because I'd burn it off just as quickly.

Sixthly, I have to register for 12 hours next semester in order to keep my Pell Grant. I can't afford a full 12 hours because I don't get quite enough money back. Maybe I can register for some online classes at the regional campuses. Pain in the ass.

Bitch, bitch, bitch. I know that's all I'm doing lately, but it comes and then it goes. Hopefully things will level out soon.

Comments

[starinthegutter.livejournal.com]

Hey, these are probably obvious suggestions, job wise, but have you tried checking student services at your college for Job postings? How about Craigslist, and Kijiji? I would think that if anything, student services could help you out, or any local youth employment agencies.

[obliviousally.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I check the on-campus jobs frequently. But many of them, outside of the dining services (which clash with my Art History class), they have requirements I don't meet. Like a certain major, or only Federal Work Study. That sort of thing. So it's a pain. The art modeling job I have pays well, but it's infrequent and only my assignment. Plus, it's only 2.5 hours a day.

Tony and I check Craigslist frequently. But for every e-mail I've sent out or tried to contact, I've gotten a whole lot of nothing in return. Plus, I'd figure since everywhere is hiring for the holidays, it wouldn't be hard to grab something. But that's proving difficult.

[take-walker.livejournal.com]

All I can tell you on the job front is, don't take it personally. :| There pretty much are no jobs here (unless you like working 12 hours a day in a hot factory!) This goes double with the job market, so... it's not you. It really isn't. You just have to get lucky.