Y'know...

[obliviousally_lj]

It really pisses me off when I TRY and TRY to find something. Because I require it for us to go out and have a good time. And when I fail, it's viciously thrown back into my face. It LOOKED for that goddamn ID, goddamnit. And I couldn't find it. I looked for TWO FUCKING HOURS. Me AND Noir. And it's nowhere to be found. And then you have to throw it back at me and make me guilty for not finding it, when it's obviously not here. I can't help if it's not here. I can't magically conjure it up. It doesn't work like that. I'm sorry that I ruined the plans for tonight. I'm sorry that I'm such a fucking idiot and can't keep track of things. But you just say 'whatever'. Don't whatever me, I'm not fucking Chealsea. I give a fuck, I looked and looked until I was on the verge of tears because I wanted us to go out and have fun. Because I knew you'd do this when we couldn't go out. Fucking christ, can't you be a little more lienient? Couldn't we have figured out something else to do? It's not the end of the world if we don't go to the club. And after you were so cool about it on the phone. Actually consoling me cause I was freaking out cause I couldn't find it. Jesus fuck. I bent over backwards to look for that damn thing. Tore the room apart and put it back together. There's nothing I can do if it's not here. And I'm sorry.

Or maybe I should just fucking not do anything anymore. I'm such a fucking klutz and I can't go a day without losing something and it being my fault regardless.