obliviousally_lj

When they came and cut our power off the other day, the upstairs didn't go out. The wiring's weird in the house, since it's so old, so when something like that happens, sometimes we'll have either up or downstairs power. I jury-rigged cords so I could keep the fridge running - so we wouldn't lose all of our food - and so we could run the microwave. The lights upstairs were on fine and I was careful not to plug too many things in/have too much running at once through any one power strip.

Of course, since the world is cruel and hateful, while I was warming up some food, a fuse blew and now we're completely without power.

I want to cry. I might actually cry. I have around $600 to my name right now and $525 of that is rent. Now $300 of it has to go on a fucking light bill that should've been paid - OR I SHOULD HAVE BEEN INFORMED OF THE FACT THAT THE TRANSACTION DIDN'T GO THROUGH - and fuck myself over for November rent.

Yeah, I'm not pleased, to say the least. I want to throw shit and it's been very difficult to hold back the urge to just start chucking candles.

But I don't know what the fuck I'm going to do once I pay this. I'll have less than half rent for next month and job hunting has brought up nothing. I won't be back at the bookstore until December, either. I can't take commissions because I haven't been able to fucking draw lately. There's pretty much no one I can ask for that sort of money from and I wouldn't be able to pay anyone back for that sort of sum until the summer - at the earliest.

I tried so goddamn hard to keep on top of things and make sure my shit was paid. Apparently, all that's good for is getting a kick right back in the face, I guess.